Thursday, November 30, 2006

Breaking news

UPDATE: Apparently this is a hoax

Comments: This bogus "news story" credited to AP began making the email rounds on June 2, 2006. No such article was published by the Associated Press or any other legitimate media outlet.
Though its exact origin has yet to be determined, an
early version was posted on the Museum of Hoaxes message board on December 20, 2005.
One obvious clue that it's a prank is this purported quote -- actually a popular catchphrase from "Family Matters" -- from White's suicide note: "Did I do that?"
The answer is no.


I received this in an email. May his soul rest in peace. I loved family matters and even just watched a re-run on tuesday!

Jaleel White ('Steve Urkel') Is Dead


LOS ANGELES, California (AP) --
Jaleel White, who played 'nerdy ' neighbor Steve Urkel on "Family Matters" found dead Monday. He was 29 years old.
White was pronounced dead on arrival after admission to an LA hospital early Monday morning. The death is being investigated as a suicide.
Born Jaleel Ahmad White, he began his career at the age of three acting in television commercials, before landing guest spots on shows such as "The Jeffersons" and "Mr. Belvedere." It was in 1989 that White landed the role that would make him famous, playing wacky neighbor 'Steve Urkel' on the ABC program "Family Matters."
Following the cancellation of "Family Matters" in 1997, friends claim White became obsessed with the character, and grew despondent, despite further successes as star and producer of the UPN sitcom "Grownups", and as a writer for NBA.com Neighbor and friend, Bradley Spencer alerted police after hearing what he described as "a loud bang" coming from White's Los Angeles apartment.
Authorities state that upon entering the home they discovered a young African-American male with an apparently self-inflicted gunshot wound to the head. Also found was a note, which read simply "Did I do that?", a popular catchphrase from the show.
"Jaleel was an uncommonly good man, an exceptional role model and a great comedic actor," said William Bickley, who created the series, and Thomas L. Miller, one of the executive producers, in a joint statement.
"We feel privileged to have known him and worked with him. He'll be missed and remembered every day by his many, many friends," they said.
Actress Kellie Williams -- Laura Winslow on the series -- described White as a consummate professional actor. "Everyone adored him," she said.
"We have all lost a dear, dear brother," said Reginald VelJohnson, who played Carl Winslow. White, an only child, is survived by "cousins, aunts, uncles, and wonderful friends," Bickley said.

Doesn't say anything about parents...hmm

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Me weird?

Weird things about me....I

1) Google peoples names to find out more about them
2) Can be put off by a guy based on his smell (Good or bad.... a really potent aftershave smells PLAYER)
3) Get goosebumps from seeing water hyacinth, clusters of insects etc
4) Smell stuff before I eat (in a posh subtle way lol) to know if I'll like it
5) Can switch moods quite quickly from deleriously excited to somber (don't worry just send a few shots my way)
6) Love bread and can survive on just bread and water
7) Have fantasy boyfriends until the real life version speaks to me.
8) Listen to the channel with meditations to relax passengers when flying
9) Love anything classic...books, movies, songs.....
10) Love to take abstract photgraphs

Not extremely weird right? Whats weird about you?

Friday, November 24, 2006

To clear things up.

I'm on a trainee program and it starts here in Nigeria for the first 6 months. Then I get to move. Naijabloke, Uzo, Mona and everyone else...thats why I'm still here oh. No man like Babaalaye mentioned lol

Lagos 101- The Crew

Lagos is situated in Nigeria, Africa. Once I can upload a pic, I will.

The Lagos Crew

Lagos, the commercial hub of Nigeria is also the largest city….as in overpopulated with approximately 15 million people. Note that this number is those that were counted, some people actually believe those counting have more sinister uses for the information and so hide during the census exercise. Even better, Ifeanyi the driver said he didn’t want Lagos to benefit from him being counted; instead he would go and be counted in his town of Imo State, so that when Biafra succeeded he would be a registered member of the state. I haven’t seen the result of the last one done in March 2006. The one before that was in 1991.

As I was saying, Lagos is overpopulated with all sorts of people. I have divided them up into crews. Please note that this is just something a bored girl sat down to piece together in less than an hour and is a major generalization. If you are offended…Life is really not that serious.

The ‘I feel alright’ crew (IFA)

These are the crème de la crème. Celebrities in town seen in every publication and at every party and born with large white gold spoons in their mouths (not silver). Butter won’t melt in their mouth. Money is not an object, everything can be charged to the large family account. This is not necessarily a bad thing, but some have unbelievable attitudes. Requirements to belong to this crew include the right name, and or old money. You can catch a view of them by forcing your way into a party hosted by a well known name owner and BINGO! The only problem is that you may be ignored or asked to serve the celebrities so dress well and comport yourself with dignity. Be mysterious and they will be eating out of your hands. Oh another tip, achieve a bright skin tone by any means, it helps.

The ‘White collar’ crew (WC)

Those in this group have worked hard to earn their money. They don’t necessarily have a history of wealth in the family or a popular name. They have good jobs, rub shoulders with IFA’s at social events and can afford most things but may choose not to splurge since the money is actually hard earned. Some don’t know their level and spend their pay check each month with no savings all in the effort of trying to keep up with the IFA crew. These poor misdirected individuals actually feel part and parcel of the IFA’s. To move up to IFA, a WC can perhaps seal a marriage deal or be extremely successful so the family name becomes known.

There is a sub group here

The EXPAT crew (EX)

A bunch of Oyinbo gals and boys, men and women who come to Nigeria to work and are paid EXPAT salaries. They are usually without their families and can be found at clubs such as ‘WHY NOT’, ‘PATS BAR’ and sometimes ‘BACCHUS’ etc. They attract BCBG’s (see below).

The ‘Blue Collar Boys and Girls’ crew (BCBG)

Those in the BCBG crew have average jobs and earn an average or sometimes meager amount of money which they use to try and make ends meet. Some have been looking for jobs for as long as they can remember. They may have good degrees but no connections or opportunities and instead may resort to less than attractive jobs including surfing the net for ‘opportunities’. Some get lucky breaks and move up to the WC’s.

There are subgroups to this category

Area Boys (AB)

Areaaaa oh area oh. This group of people own Lagos state. You may need to pay a small token for parking on their road, taking a route they have blocked or if your car happens to breakdown in their jurisdiction. Danfo drivers will tell you stories of woe about how these boys tax them constanly and LASMA officials will tell you how their work is ditrupted daily. Telecom companies will tell you about all the people they need to settle before a mobile cell site can be built and police officers will tell you how many cases have been solve with their help, once palms have been greased of course.

Area Girls (AG)

Not in the same agbero sense that the area boys are taken. These girls know all the tricks of the trade. They are Lagos savvy and know all the men around. They have ‘sponsors’ all over the place. These dads send for the girls to meet them in any part of Nigeria when they need ‘servicing’. The attraction is the money that the dads spend on AG’s in appreciation for a job well done. They even get to go abroad to the envy of all around them. They are always blinging and this group also cuts across the IFA and WC crew, you most probably know one. Only a few days ago I got jist about some girls who don’t need a dime from anyone in this life but choose to sell their wares regardless. Of course it’s all very high class. Hey maybe its the thrill of rubbing a pot belly.

Poor

The final crew is the very poor. I can’t find anything light to say about this group. It’s unfortunate that many in Lagos live below poverty in Nigeria. Many beg, borrow or steal. And life for them is nothing that we can imagine. The divide between the IFA the very poor is verrrrrry wide.

The moral of the story? If you plan to move back to Nigeria, listen closely….YOU NEED A POSSE. It’s necessary for survival....like minded people you can have fun with or you will go crazy. Part of the posse should know their way around town because we don’t want the blind leading the blind now, do we? Mark my words….I tell you this, I tell you. There are nice, down to earth peeps in all of the crews then there are also not so nice, not so down to earth people. Keep away.

I think you have had enough training today, come back next week for Lesson 2.

Tminx signing out.

xx

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Wazzaaappp

So I started my new job and its no fun being the new kid on the block who isn't down with everything going on. I'm on my best behaviour, all quiet and all trying to absorb everything going on around me. Once I get comfortable I'll be able to break out of that shell. I don't stay this way for long lol.

I'm starting a new blog on fridays called Lagos 101..Things you should know about lagos in general. Mostly it will be tongue in cheek but I'll try and give you enough good information. I wanted to make it wednesdays but seeing as its wednesday ina few secs and I don't have a work laptop yet...Friday it is.

My friend who got married is fine, I will go and see her wedding pictures this weekend. She said it was so much fun she just wanted to share it with her good friends. Awwww. Well we have the reception here in Lagos so that should be good.

Its midweek thank God. Nearly the end of an awkward first week. Enjoy whats left of your week and check back here on friday! :)

Friday, November 17, 2006

Oh by the way

So after all that mind preparation, pops has had the final say on my travelling and its a big fat NO. My mum and I tried to make him see reason including the fact that my friend is going to think im using that at as a major excuse but he is adamant.

'You are not going!, no way, please, we were to send a girl at the company to Benin and her father wrote to say the road is bad and he would not risk his daughters life. Its the same here, I don't trust these planes, infact they are about to ALL be grounded. Please my daughter, you can't go. Get her a very nice present.'
'Daddy nothing is going to happen, and A is going to be very mad at me. She'll think I'm lying cos I was avoiding it. I can't miss it and there are other people going anyway'
'Is it Aero? Is it Virgin?' No
'TELL HER TO CALL ME IF SHE DOES NOT BELIEVE YOU'

This man sef. Needless to say I think I've lost a friend :(

Have a great weekend people. I officialy start my new job on Monday. Wish me luck on my first day :)

Thursday, November 16, 2006

No pressure?

My people I received the shock of my life yesterday oh. As of yesterday I could swear on anything (no that I swear) that my father wanted me in this house. Yes his first daughter, he would never want to part with her. But I was in for a rude shock. At breakfast he turned to me and said

"Tminx, your mother said that the way you and your friends are going, you don't want to settle down"

What?? What does he mean settle down please....then my mother interrupts

"Thats not what I meant now (smiling sheepishly), I was just saying that they all pack around in large groups...mostly single girls, how do they give guys a chance?"

So I promptly told him he was free to introduce me to any eligible people he knew because I know he never would.

"Me? No way, do your own work"
"I tried oh, a very good family was interested, their son is a MEDICAL DOCTOR in America.." Isn't this the stuff of village movies?
"Mummy, Iowa is not America as far as I'm concerned and he is too old and was extremely boring on the phone".
"Since when is 35 old, how many years is between your father and I?"
"35 is not old now", my dad interjects

At this point I'm looking at the two of them like we all stepped into some horror movie, they can't be serious. My father has never encouraged my mum like this nowwww, why is he pulling a fast one. He's probably trying to make up with her for some offence.

"Anyway they stopped calling because you were unresponsive. Just make sure you don't drive all the men away because he is too old or has a big nose, or is too short or not cool enough. At the end of the day they will stop coming".

"Yes mother"

Wonders shall never cease.

Guys I have to go to Kaduna on Saturday with CHACHAINGI for my friends wedding. I tried all means to get out of it cas y'all know how I'm petrified of flying especially local flights with all the wahala but she and her husband have been peristent and I'm starting to look like a spoil sport. I was scared but todays reading was about overcoming obstacles that end up crippling your spiritual growth and in the Bible (Positive Living) today, I noticed a little prayer...

By the grace and power of the Lord Jesus Christ, I'm going to find interest in life; I'm going to put interest into my living. By the grace and power of the Lord Jesus Christ, I'm going to live with delight and excitement; I'm going to live with enthusiasm.

So with excitement and enthusiasm, I travel for my friends wedding tomorrow. I'll be back to tell you guys about it on Monday by Gods grace.

Later!

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Know your stuff.

www.Saharareporters.com: Exclusive


Age of Nigerian Registered Aircrafts

Average Age (Active Aircrafts) = 23.24 Years

Oldest Aircraft = 38 Years Old
Youngest Aircraft (Presidency) = 1 Years Old

Number of Aircrafts (Years Old)
1 (1-5)
3 (6 -10)
1 (11-15)
7 (16-20)
20(21-25)
1 (26-30)
7 (31-35)
1 (36-40)

The pattern for the airlines listed below will be colour coded as such.

Aircraft Manufacturers Serial Number

Operators (Property, Wet-leasing, Dry-leasing)

Status First flight date [MM/DD/YYYY]

Age of Aircraft (Years) As of 11/1/2006


5N-BEE Boeing 737 (MSN 22365) ADC Airlines Active with ADC Airlines 9/10/1980 26


5N-BFK [CRASHED -10/29/2006] Boeing 737 (MSN 22891) ADC Airlines Active with ADC Airlines 9/27/1983 23


5N-BHI Boeing 737 (MSN 22864) Chanchangi Airlines Active with Chanchangi Airlines 2/16/1983 23

Now that you know the pattern, here are the remaining airlines.


5N-BHY Boeing 737 (MSN 24669) AeroContractors Active with AeroContractors 8/8/1990 16
5N-MJA Boeing 737 (MSN 24454) Arik Air Active with AeroContractors 7/12/1989 17
5N-BHZ Boeing 737 (MSN 24671) AeroContractors Active with AeroContractors 8/24/1990 16
5N-YMM Boeing 737 (MSN 22590) Albarka Air Active with Albarka Air 3/16/1982 24
5N-MJB Boeing 737 (MSN 24360) Arik Air Active with Arik Air 3/10/1989 17
5N-BFM Boeing 737 (MSN 22733) Bellview Airlines Active with Bellview Airlines 10/26/1981 25
5N-BFX Boeing 737 (MSN 23024) Bellview Airlines Active with Bellview Airlines 5/3/1983 23
5N-BGG Boeing 767 (MSN 23805) Bellview Airlines Active with Bellview Airlines 7/2/1987 19
5N-BGH Boeing 767 (MSN 23806) Bellview Airlines Active with Bellview Airlines 7/29/1987 19
5N-BEV Boeing 737 (MSN 22658) Chanchangi Airlines Active with Chanchangi Airlines 4/6/1982 24
5N-BEW Boeing 737 (MSN 22865) Chanchangi Airlines Active with Chanchangi Airlines 4/11/1983 23
5N-BIF Boeing 737 (MSN 23043) Chanchangi Airlines Active with Chanchangi Airlines 6/1/1983 23
5N-BIG Boeing 737 (MSN 23044) Chanchangi Airlines Active with Chanchangi Airlines 6/8/1983 23
5N-BIH Boeing 737 (MSN 23046) Chanchangi Airlines Active with Chanchangi Airlines 8/5/1983 23
5N-BGU Boeing 737 (MSN 22881) Slok Air Active with Dasab Airlines 12/3/1982 24
5N-BDP Boeing 737 (MSN 23114) Dasab Airlines Active with Dasab Airlines 11/21/1983 23
5N-BEI Boeing 737 (MSN 19708) Earth Airlines Active with Earth Airlines 10/24/1968 38
5N-BEY Boeing 737 (MSN 22504) EAS Active with EAS 9/28/1981 25
5N-BGM Boeing 737 (MSN 22889) EAS Active with EAS 8/11/1983 23
5N-FGT Boeing 737 Next Gen (MSN 34260) Federal Government of Nigeria Active with Federal Government of Nigeria 6/29/2005 1
5N-BFQ Boeing 737 (MSN 22892) Fresh Air Active with Fresh Air 9/30/1983 23
5N-EEE Boeing 747 (MSN 19732) Kabo Air Active with Kabo Air 4/28/1971 35
5N-NNN Boeing 747 (MSN 21189) Kabo Air Active with Kabo Air 11/11/1975 31
5N-OOO Boeing 747 (MSN 20952) Kabo Air Active with Kabo Air 9/20/1974 32
5N-PDP Boeing 747 (MSN 20842) Kabo Air Active with Kabo Air 5/13/1974 32
5N-PPP Boeing 747 (MSN 20921) Kabo Air Active with Kabo Air 6/28/1974 32
5N-JJJ Boeing 747 (MSN 19766) Kabo Air Active with Kabo Air 2/13/1971 35
5N-RRR Boeing 747 (MSN 19765) Kabo Air Active with Kabo Air 2/10/1971 35
5N-ANY Boeing 737 (MSN 22773) Nigeria Airways Active with Nigeria Airways 7/1/1982 24
5N-BCR ATR 42/72 (MSN 031) Overland Airways Active with Overland Airways 10/29/1986 20
5N-BID Boeing 737 (MSN 23791) Premium Air Shuttle Active with Premium Air Shuttle 12/4/1987 19
5N-BGL McDonnell Douglas MD-80/90 (MSN 48099) Sosoliso Active with Sosoliso 3/29/1982 24
5N-BII McDonnell Douglas MD-80/90 (MSN 49482) Sosoliso Active with Sosoliso 8/20/1986 20
5N-BGA Boeing 737 (MSN 22456) Space World Airlines Active with Space World Airlines 2/11/1981 25
5N-BGB Boeing 737 (MSN 22457) Space World Airlines Active with Space World Airlines 4/10/1981 25
5N-TSA Boeing 737 (MSN 23110) TranSky Active with TranSky 3/19/1984 22
5N-VNB Boeing 737 (MSN 29339) Virgin Nigeria Active with Virgin Nigeria 8/4/1999 7
5N-VNC Boeing 737 (MSN 29338) Virgin Nigeria Active with Virgin Nigeria 6/15/1999 7
5N-VND Boeing 737 (MSN 29337) Virgin Nigeria Active with Virgin Nigeria 6/4/1999 7

5N-BIB Dash 8 (MSN 609) AeroContractors Active with AeroContractors Unknown
5N-DAP Dash 8 (MSN 244) AeroContractors Active with AeroContractors Unknown
5N-MGV Dash 8 (MSN 24) AeroContractors Active with AeroContractors Unknown
5N-BHW Dash 8 (MSN 548) CHC Helicopters International Active with CHC Helicopters International Unknown
5N-BIA Dash 8 (MSN 608) CHC Helicopters International Active with CHC Helicopters International Unknown
5N-GRS Dash 8 (MSN 547) Nigerian Gvmt Active with Federal Government of Nigeria Unknown
5N-RSG Embraer 135/145 (MSN 891) Federal Government of Nigeria Active with Federal Government of Nigeria Unknown

5N-BBI ATR 42/72 (MSN 069) ADC Airlines Active under another registration 11/10/1987 19
5N-BVU Airbus A300 (MSN 633) Bellview Airlines Active under another registration 4/1/1992 14
5N-BHA Boeing 737 (MSN 23283) EAS Active under another registration 4/25/1985 21
5N-IFY Boeing 737 (MSN 22797) Slok Air Active under another registration 10/6/1982 24
5N-ZNA Boeing 737 (MSN 22806) Slok Air Active under another registration 1/10/1983 23
5N-BFB Dash 8 (MSN 298) AeroContractors Active under another registration Unknown
5N-EVD Dash 8 (MSN 216) AeroContractors Active under another registration Unknown
5N-BBM Dash 8 (MSN 266) AeroContractors Active under another registration Unknown
5N-BEH Dash 8 (MSN 300) AeroContractors Active under another registration Unknown

5N-BED Boeing 737 (MSN 22638) ADC Airlines Stored by ADC Airlines 3/23/1982 24
5N-EDO Boeing 747 (MSN 19726) Okada Air Stored by Hold Trade Air 5/16/1970 36
5N-COO Fokker 70/100 (MSN 11297) IRS Airlines Stored by IRS Airlines 3/12/1990 16
5N-AAA Boeing 747 (MSN 19745) Kabo Air Stored by Kabo Air 3/4/1971 35
5N-ZZZ Boeing 747 (MSN 19744) Kabo Air Stored by Kabo Air 11/3/1970 36
5N-ANC Boeing 737 (MSN 20671) Nigeria Airways Stored by Nigeria Airways 11/3/1972 34
5N-AND Boeing 737 (MSN 20672) Nigeria Airways Stored by Nigeria Airways 11/29/1972 34
5N-ANN McDonnell Douglas DC-10 (MSN 46957) Nigeria Airways Stored by Nigeria Airways 7/27/1976 30
5N-ANZ Boeing 737 (MSN 22774) Nigeria Airways Stored by Nigeria Airways 7/8/1982 24
5N-AUB Boeing 737 (MSN 22986) Nigeria Airways Stored by Nigeria Airways 11/1/1982 24
5N-AUH Airbus A310 (MSN 340) Nigeria Airways Stored by Nigeria Airways 6/15/1984 22
5N-AUF Airbus A310 (MSN 285) Nigeria Airways Stored by Nigeria Airways 11/9/1983 23
5N-BBJ Boeing 737 (MSN 20197) ADC Airlines Stored under another registration 3/21/1969 37
5N-GAB Boeing 747 (MSN 21141) Okada Air Stored under another registration 1/27/1976 30
5N-NYA Boeing 737 (MSN 22799) Slok Air Stored under another registration 12/15/1982 24

SCRAPPED PLANES

5N-BBB Lockheed L-1011 TriStar (MSN 1068) ADC Airlines Scrapped by ADC Airlines 2/1/2874
5N-AUE Airbus A310 (MSN 270) Nigeria Airways Scrapped by Nigeria Airways 8/24/1983
5N-AUG Airbus A310 (MSN 329) Nigeria Airways Scrapped by Nigeria Airways 5/2/1984
5N-HHS Boeing 747 (MSN 19644) Trans Air Service Scrapped by Trans Air Service 1/9/1970
5N-THG Boeing 747 (MSN 19640) Trans Air Service Scrapped by Trans Air Service 10/24/1969
5N-MCI Boeing 737 (MSN 19554) Barnax Air Scrapped under another registration 2/9/1969
5N-DIO Boeing 737 (MSN 19549) Barnax Air Scrapped under another registration 1/6/1969

5N-BFN Boeing 737 (MSN 22734) Bellview Airlines Written off with Bellview Airlines 11/13/1981
5N-AUA Boeing 737 (MSN 22985) Nigeria Airways Written off with Nigeria Airways 10/14/1982
5N-ANR McDonnell Douglas DC-10 (MSN 46968) Nigeria Airways Written off with Nigeria Airways 8/12/1977
5N-ANW Boeing 737 (MSN 22771) Nigeria Airways Written off with Nigeria Airways 4/20/1982 5N-ANX Boeing 737 (MSN 22772) Nigeria Airways Written off with Nigeria Airways 6/7/1982

I guess this doesnt neccessarily mean the planes will crash but are the parts to service them not obsolete by now? I wonder.

Monday, November 13, 2006

KARAOKE IN LAGOS

Don't forget to check out my daily PHOTOBLOG. Today features friends singing at a Karoake Bar. Checkout the archives for others.

Lagos LASTMA

I made it to work today….I had to ask popsie for fuel money while my mum daggered me with intense looks :). He’s my DADDY! Lol. She hates the fact that I don’t carry cash on me, I’m still not used to having so much cash in my bag. Whatever I take out usually finishes quite quickly. Money is so easy to spend when It's in your hand. Then the traffic was horrendous. There are various road works going on in Lekki and on the Island. To get from Ocean view to Eko Hotel takes an hour right now!

This is a befitting time to tell you all about my LASTMA experiences. These people are a pain! They are meant to make sure we all follow traffic rules and ease traffic congestion etc. In Nigeria there are several uniforms, Traffic wardens (orange and black), Police (Black), LASTMA officials (tan and wine), Army (army green), Area Boys collecting money from public transport vehicles (bright yellow), then there are others that I know not what they do but wear assorted uniforms. All I know is that they are out to get theirs. They don't just give you a ticket like it should be, they haul your car to their station and suck out your life savings and waste your time or you can bribe them and they'll let you go. The first option is not worth it

I will detail my only two experiences. The two vary drastically because when I am first faced with a difficult situation, my first reaction is always frustration which 60% of the time, leads to tears no matter how I hard I try not to, its quite sad. The second time I’m faced with the same situation, it’s not pretty. In my first year of secondary school, I had a school mother in SS2 who I one day teased about never giving me goodies as the other school mothers did. Hey I’m only human. The next day I received a letter with every insult in this world you can think of in English, written in different coloured pens on a sheet of paper, addressed to me. I cried. A few days later, she called to see why I hadn’t come to visit her and I promptly told her I didn’t want a school mother anymore. There were interrogations, punishments, amebo influences from her friends etc, but I didn’t budge. She had KILLED the love. She was surprised I never cried which she moaned about, sadist. I've seen her after that, it was all childhood experiences I guess. I digress.

LASTMA ENCOUNTER PART 1

So one blessed morning I decided to use a quick route to get to work. If anyone goes via CMS/Bonicamp, you know there was a time there were no barriers. You could come from Onikan and join the cars going to Bonicamp instead of going up the bridge to Awolowo, Ikoyi sec etc. Well yours truly didn’t know it was a ‘military zone’ for military cars only. Military cars my A$$. Danfos and every Tope, Deji and Hilary take that route but of course I look like a JJC so as I was winding my way round the bend to join the traffic, a dude jumped in from of my car. At first I thought he was an agbero cos he wasn’t wearing the uniform. He told me to wind down….

ERROR NO 1 NEVER WIND YOUR WINDOW DOWN.

He asked me for my military pass and I asked him ‘You what?’ lol. I had no idea what he was on about. He said if I wasn’t part of the military, I had to park. On a side note there were several civilian cars and Danfos going by at this point. So he directed me to park on the bridge then I opened the door and he jumped into the passenger’s side. If I had any sense I would have kept driving up the bridge cos it was free but as I said JJC.

ERROR NO 2 NEVER OPEN THE DOOR

He listed my offences and asked if I hadn’t seen the sign which was in an obscure place and I said I hadn’t. “Well its there and your fine is 25,000”. By then frustration was setting in and the tears were welling up. Such a baby right? She disgraces me a lot. Anyways cutting it short cos I feel like I’ve blogged about this before, I ended up giving him a 'fine' of N5,000 so he wouldn’t ‘tow my car to the station’ and he let me go.

ERROR NO 3 NEVER SAY HOW MUCH YOU HAVE, N1000 is the most you should give if it gets to that stage.

LASTMA ENCOUNTER PART DEUX

After relating my experience to others, I was given the tope tips with dealing with these predators.

1. Don’t stop if you don’t have to.

2. Don’t wind down.

3. Lock your doors always


I didn’t think I was bold enough to take heed to the advice, but I had been hardened after the first experience. They would never get the best of me again.

I had appointment on the island and was running late. As I approach Akponbon, my phone rings and as I raise it up to answer, one dude in the LASTMA uniform jumps out from nowhere and stands in front of my car. He motions at the phone and uses his two hands to suggest I stop and park. I slow down and immediately put the phone down. I apologise with my hands and try to move on. He shakes his head saying I have to park so I move the car just a little bit forward. He warns me again saying I must stop. At this point there are no more cars in front of me so the only thing in my way is this dude. I inch forward. He calls his boy and they both stand in front of the car. YOU DON”T KNOW ME. I’m getting angry at this point. I didn’t even talk into the phone, I just picked it up! So with all the anger in me, I REVVVVVVVVVVVVV the car engine (lol, the car has issues, it doesn't move immediately when you accelerate), and those two dudes...? I’m sure they’d win in an Olympic 100m sprint. SUCKEEEEEERS.

NOTE TO YOUNGNS: DON’T TRY THIS AT HOME. PLEASE LET YOUR CAR BE TOWED AND PAY THE FINE. THANKS

How was you weekend? I went out Saturday night to the new Lounge next to Bacchus also owned by the management of Bacchus. 6 Degrees North. It’s very very nice. Make sure you go when you are in Lagos.

Thursday, November 09, 2006

To the Left

Here's Beyonces Video. Have you ever dumped someone? I haven't ..more like mutual agreements to end the relationship. I would feel so bad but I guess when you're fed up, you're fed up. But really girls, would you be able to 'keep' a man. She paid his bills, bought his car etc etc. I have never had that kind of relationship, even with a girlfriend! It just seems like he is less of a man...and see the insult when she's throwing him out with his boxes. Guys, can you be kept men?

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Amazing Grace

An Amazing Grace in Lagos


Picture from http://www.theamazinggracefilm.com

My country peoplleeeeee, I have finally watched a good quality Nigerian Movie. It’s called the Amazing grace and I loved it although there were a few cheesy moments. I went to the cinema with no expectations except the fact that I’d heard it was ‘good’ which is really subjective. Compared to all other Nollywood stuff I give it an A. The fact that the natives spoke Efik which was subtitled in English preserved the authenticity of the story centered around the slave trade period. I loved the cast especially one of the main characters ANSA whose name is Mbong Obungide. I think she did a good job for a first timer. Fred Amata the main dude was so so. KUDOS JETA AMATA! You did Nigeria proud.

The Amazing Grace is one of the most ambitious projects to come out of the Nollywood stable. Reputed to be the first major international feature film from the Nigerian movie industry, it highlights the epic story of the British slave trader, John Newton’s voyage to Nigeria in 1748, and how this experience helped inspired him to compose the world famous hymn, Amazing Grace.

The film was directed by the internationally acclaimed Nigerian filmmaker, Jeta Amata. Already one of the Nolywood’s top directors, Jeta Amata had recently worked with the BBC and two of his latest films were shown at last year’s Berlin Film festival. The Amazing Grace was also screened at this year’s Cannes Film Festival.

The movie, The Amazing Grace features a cast of renowned actors from Nigeria, the US and Britain, including Nick Moran (Lock Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels). Shooting started on December 1, 2004 in the Nigerian City of Calabar, which has recently become a Mecca of sort for filmmakers, with a multi-billion naira investment in state-of-the-art equipment and technology. The production was flagged off and has the backing of His Excellency, the Governor of Cross River State, Mr. Donald Duke, who has been instrumental to the success of the project.

In 1748, at the height of the slave-trading era, John Newton sails to the coast of Nigeria and the port of Calabar. Now captain of this ship, The Greyhound, his previous experience in the slave trade had turned him away from religion, into a coarse man with new morals.

Slaves were rounded up by force and trickery; villages raided and burned down, the captives kept in dungeons, chained like animals as John Newton fills his ship with his what he hardly considers human.

But as he leaves the Nigerian coast with a ship load of slaves, a violent storm brings John Newton to the point of death and causes him to re-evaluate his life. He attributes his miraculous escape to The Amazing Grace of God, although it is one of the slaves who actually saved him.

Despite receiving The Amazing Grace, John Newton continues his slave trading. It makes an act of humanity from one of the slaves he considers animals to show him the true meaning of the words. He finally renounces slave trading and decides to devote his life to religion.


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Monday, November 06, 2006

Moving on

It’s a strange feeling…a mixed bag of emotions. I have moved on so many times in my life but it’s still with a little bit of excitement and apprehension.

I remember vividly moving from Benin to Lagos and starting school at Corona VI. I was the new kid on the block and most of the girls had their little clicks. I stuck to myself most times but tried to join in the fun and activities sometimes. I was painfully shy and very sensitive so I was easy an easy target. Even then I still had episodes of crazy behaviour like shifting my seat partners chair so he fell on his butt. He had been running to gossip about me with his friend each time he got up. I didn't mind school but didn't particularly like it. I would try so hard to fit in, be like the cool kids until I realised it was pointless and so I learnt to be myself and suddenly it didn't seem so hard anymore.

Then secondary school came and I wanted to be in the same school as my bestest cousin in the world so we planned it all and took the exams and at the last minute she decided she wanted to go to another school where all her friends were. So I had gotten myself into a big problem. Going to a school all the way in Benin where I knew no one and boy were the girls harsh. I had fallen back into my pattern...trying to fit in and coming across as soft and a very easy target. I still remember a girl called Chichi. On the last day of school in JS2 first term, all our friends had been picked up one by one until it was me and her left. She turned to me with disgust on her face…"How could they leave me here with YOU?!", and walked off. I can never forget, we didn't even have any quarrels before that. I was about 9 or 10. I never went back to that school. Not because of the 'incident' but the distance to Lagos and the fact that I was very ill that holiday.

I changed school and vowed I'd have a new beginning. I was going to repackage myself. I would not come across as soft, I would be strong. I would speak up for myself. I would give you ten for every one they gave me. I won the award for razor mouth the next year. But I was still soft when it came to certain people. I guess you just can't completely rid yourself of your innate personality. I remember having to go on a school trip and there being only one seat left on the bus but there were three of us left to get on. I decided to stick with my friend and miss the school trip but last minute...she got on. Yes you know who you are Ms T A-K lol. So it was me and the other girl who I wasn't really friends with left to make the most of the day.

Moving at 16 was another emotional moment. I was excited to be off, where I'd have freedom to do what I liked and I'd be too far away to be reprimanded. I was happy going to school and staying up late watching TV and shopping and eating take out and hanging out with my nigerian flatmate who was the total opposite of me. My defender. VOLTRINA. We were like sisters, I loved her but not all the time lol. This was freedom to me and I loved it. I wanted to be responsible so my friend and I decided to get a job. I remember my first job at MacDonald’s and getting a warning because I was 30 minutes late due to the fact that I'd locked myself out and my wallet was in the house. I even knocked on my neighbours’ door to borrow some money to get to work and back at which point I would promptly pay her because my flatmate would be home. I don't think she even answered me before shutting the door. It reminded me of my neighbours in Nigeria and how that could never have happened. I was so upset because I had never been late and the manager had not taken that into account. I quit shortly after and decided working with insensitive bosses wasn't for me. I also realised I didn't really need the extra money.

I remember at 17 getting to Uni and shedding tears in my room cos everything was so foreign and unfriendly and parents were dropping off their kids while I had pulled all my luggage alone from London to Bristol and to the campus. The room looked so bare and my flatmates barely nodded a greeting. I didn't want to be responsible; I just wanted to be at home eating a home cooked meal. I got over it eventually. I always do. Then I started having a little fun and eventually a blast.

I remember starting my MBA and having to go to Paris for the first leg. I had never been, didn't have an apartment and no one I met spoke any English. I had to get a place to stay, a phone, load credit on it, manoeuvre the metro, get to my Uni, and shop for food all in a foreign language. Boy did I bastardise that sexy language. I had many moments of frustration but it made me a stronger person. I was able to settle down eventually and also in the other countries we had to settle in but by then I had a good group of friends who were in for the ride as well. I even made more along the way especially the best group of Naija girls I met in Philly. I'm truly glad I met them. I had stopped trying hard to fit in a long time ago. I let people try and fit in with me.

Then the decision to move back to Nigeria. I had made up my mind. Many tried to sway me but I was certain that it was the right path to take but I didn't know why. For the first 5 months, I could have shot myself for probably making the most stupid decision of my life. Lagos is the capital of frustration especially when you are used to things working like clockwork. But guess what, things can only get better and they did. Many others moved back home, I got a job and wasn't bored anymore and we actually have fun, besides fun is what you make of your time.

Now I'm moving on to a new job, with new people and even though I’m apprehensive, I know from the pattern of my life, things can only get better from here. I'm going to miss my colleagues here. They are a great bunch of people who make me laugh all the time. I hope the new set isn’t ANAL. lol. I'm resigning formally today. Just waiting for the HR to step in then I'll send out the email.

Dear Friends,

This is to formally inform you all that I will be moving on.

I have resigned my appointment with X Limited and November 06, 2006 will be my last work day.

It has been a pleasure working with all of you and I have enjoyed the time I have spent working here but I have accepted a job offer in a different role to procurement which I believe will provide me with new career challenges.

I thank you all for your support and wish you all the best.

Regards

Tminx

Thursday, November 02, 2006

Insight To My Life

Gud Dag!

My training week is finally coming to an end! Thank God cos I am exhausted. We are out at 7 and don't get back till at least 10pm.

Its snowing here in Sweden, can you believe it? The snow was unexpected and its been so comical. We were going somewhere outside stockholm on a bus when it started snowing and because the country was ill prepared, all the cars were slipping and sliding. Apparently people slept in their cars cos the couldn't get off the highway. We were lucky enough to stop by a train station and we took the train instead. We finally got home at 12 midnight. Its -2 and the floor is so slippery. My boots have no grips, its lucky I haven't fallen flat on my face yet. But its so beautiful!

Everyone speaks english here and right now I'm watching CSI NY in english subtitled in Swedish.

Shopping is a NO NO. Everything here is freaking expensive, even the food but man has got to eat. Its 1 dollar to 7 swedish kroners and I haven't spotted any poor people yet. Seems like this is an ideal country to belong to. Education is free till 18 and the get paid well.

I'll post some pics on Ofoto soon. It gets lonely in this damn hotel sometimes. Why don't I have some young man to talk to at times like these??? Being single can be such a pain sometimes! Enjoy the weekend all.