Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Insight To My Life

Saw this and couldn't help laughing. Guys wouldn't you love this remote control?

So I have to share my road rage story with you guys.

I went to silverbird yesterday to meet with Kofo and this is what happened to dampen my spirits after watching John Tucker must die which was aight.

Soooo, I was parallel parked on the side of the road (near the gate of the car park) and in order to leave, I had to do a 3 point turn (google to those of you that are not aware and bought your drivers lisence :)). There was also a car parked on the other side of the road so I had to reverse to complete the turn ie I couldn't just reverseee vrruummmmm and turn.

Anyhoo so I had done the first turn in like a split second and was reversing into the second when I heard a loud BAM...somebody was banging on the car so I screeched to a halt. Low and behold I looked back and someone, in that split second had parked behind me and my car was just about to hit his car. I would have so smashed his side door in. I was now sandwiched between the two cars. So in blind rage I got out of the car and asked if the fellow was on drugs.....'did you not see me trying to reverse, are you crazy? are you on drugs?.'!!!. My car was across the road blocking outgoing AND incoming traffic. Of course the inevitable happened, stupid passer by's, drivers from the cars being held up etc etc all started with their rubbish talk...'WOMAN get in your car and move dis tin jo.. just go straight to the end of the road and turn there' I lost it.." YOU are ALLLL crazy, are you blind? Im not leaving here till the dude leaves my back so I can finish my turn. Why should I have to go?" One passerby dude felt the need to talk to me..I said 'Please don't let me insult you this evening. Kindly step away from my window, thanks'. So thats how it went for about 5 mins with ppl cursing etc.

I entered my car and put on some music and closed the doors. So you see I was becoming more crazed by the minute ppl were banging on the car etc etc..Then a security Police dude came to the window and attempted to pretend hit the car with the butt of his gun in a swinging motion....I wound down the window and said PLEASSSSSEEEE SHOOOTTTTT MEEEEE PLEEEEEEASEEEEEEEEEE, I NEED YOU TO SHOOTTTT ME RIGHT NOW.

I think I'm crazy don't you.

I was eventually satisfied with the 10 mins I had taken out of every idiots life there and proceeded to leave them wallowing in their misery. I was sufficiently placated.

Thanks for reading my story. And may God help me in my anger. AMEN

36 comments:

LondonBuki said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
LondonBuki said...

TMinxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx!!!

LOL!!!!! I love you too much! Why wasn't I there to witness your rare moment of madness????

I can picture you with your small self trying to act like wonder woman.

Let us thank God noone went crazy on you oh!

God help you in your anger... AMEN!

LOL!!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

londonbuki, u r under the false impression that her moments of madness are rare????

Anyways i'll just keep saying it; the day an okada rider / taxi driver / pedestrian or any other random passer-by decides to b***h-slap you, you are on your own oh.

TaureanMinx said...

@ londonbuki ill let you know when next time round. Maybe its lack of MAN loll, I crack myself up. God dey

@anonymous, only one person can say that, Anonymous ko... Let them try it...

LondonBuki said...

LOL @ Anon!!!

Nneka's World said...

hahahaha!
Talk about road rage at its best!
Yes give it to them.
they are all mad drivers there, i know i cursed everyone of them mora**** everytime i got on the road to drive!

low said...

LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

BABY.SEE WHY I LOVE U SO MUCH..U UNLEASH THE DRAGON IN YOU WHEN I LEAST EXPECT IT...BUT LETS HAVE U DRIVE ON A HILL NOW ULL B SCARED..LOL

Anonymous said...

That was a high note of irresponsibility on ur side too....
Thank ur lucky stars that u did not meet one of those crazy police officers or army guys.....they would have shown u pepper...ONLY IF UR PAPA BE..........

TaureanMinx said...

@nneka, thanks my sister
@low, i'm learning from you lol..ahn ahn I can do the hill thing now. I'm not scurred anymore.
@anonymous..hence my prayer to God cos serioulsly sometimes I just work with the anger. Next time I'll count to 20.

zaiprincesa said...

qhqdlol..LMAO....ROAD RAGE OH!!!>>....wow...im sure those pple were raining curses at you....WHO THEM BE , jare??/...FIGHT FOR YOUR RIGHT!!!...just make sure u have back up with you next time...lol..Have a blessed week!

Belle said...

I'm still laughing at this outburst:
"PLEASSSSSEEEE SHOOOTTTTT MEEEEE PLEEEEEEASEEEEEEEEEE, I NEED YOU TO SHOOTTTT ME RIGHT NOW. "

OMG!!!!! You must have been hella angry!! bwahahahaha!

Oz said...
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oz said...

stop this ur naija road rage!! lol..and try to curtail ur anger..one day someone will get violent with u..learn to be of gentler persuasion..like me..

Don Chi as Blog Marley a.k.a. El Senor Supremo said...

where's th bit with your tears?

Noni Moss said...

ROTFLMAO! Lolllllllllllllll - i'm crying with laughter - people at work are looking at me like I'm a mad woman. Oh man! I can just picture it. You see what moving back to the mad country does to you??

Olawunmi said...

lol. now that was just mad. only in lagos. are you sure that these moments of madness are rare?

Onada said...

LOL hilarious!! i would have give them a full 30 minutes of madness. things like that IRK ME!!

Anonymous said...

This is Chicafricana...who told me to switch to Blogger Beta...now I can't leave comments on folks pages except it's anonymous. Anyhoo.......LMAO!!!!!!!! I would have been scared of them folks!!!! Go girl.

Mona said...

HAHAHAHAAHAHAH u have killed me!Is this what Naija has done to you...I cant wait to start screaming like that at people on the road....

Boso said...

LOL !! You've brought back memories of many incidents on the streets on Lagos....

teatylawla said...

lol..really funny incident i must say,..but next time babes,..take am easy o and count to 20 like u said.

teatylawla said...

lol..really funny incident,.but next times babes,..just count to 20 like u said...lolllll

NaijaBloke said...

Hahaha that would have been a kodak moment o. I can imagine everybody shouting and banging on ur car.

Anyway next time just try and rub ur ears and whisper

WOSAH,WOSAH,WOSAH and u shd be fine

NaijaBloke said...

and again that remote control will be the best thing that ever happened to us o (GUYS)..LOL

calabarboy said...

A Hard Day Huh!!!

bellanaija said...

lol....that was tooo funny..
U r brave!!!!!

But seriously...u know u have to be very careful with these nigerian cops....a very close friend's dad was killed by an overzealous officer who hit him wit the butt of the gun for daring to ask questions..he then got a brain haemmorage and died! so not funny.
so please next time...count to 20...if that doesnt work...keep counting then walk/drive away

Dilch said...

That was HILARIOUS!! The security guard must have looked at you like, this babe don kolo!!!

DiAmOnD hawk said...

oh my my my....it's like i was right there witnessing it happen. Sometimes you just need to let loose like that...
you know you're really far gone when you start inviting ppl to shoot you
good one!

TaureanMinx said...

@zaiprincesa...lol thanks
@belle...i was tres mad lol
@oz, I don't have many road rage incedents sis, ur exaggerating.
@chichi, no tears, just madness lol
@noni moss, tell me about it! If you can't beat them, yell at them
@olawunmi, they r verrry rare :)
@onado, sooo annoying
@chicafricana, you'll grow a thick skin eventually
@mona, lol believe me you can wait
@boso, thanks for stopping by
@teatylawla, I will next time
@naijabloke, I'll try the wooosahhhhhh and yeah that remote control should have a male version
@calabar boy, more like a long day.
@bellanaija, may he rest in peace, yeah you never know with these peeps but there were too many ppl there for him to act up.
@dilch, I think he just wanted me gone lol
@diamond hawk..I know oh lol

uzo said...

LOL. You really want to get me fired. So i shared this blog with the work folks and suddenly everyone is telling stories of their road rage incidents. LOL. Since i just started driving myself full time, i have a few stories. I am not as calm as i used to be. Damn Nigerian drivers. LOL. They make you sooooo mad...I even ran into someone on purpose for driving badly. LOL. Lucky nothing happened to my car.

Good one

Biodun said...

Taurean, girl you had me lol, this was too funny, the worst thing I ever did was give someone the finger, lol. I give u props sha, cos I know myself I would have driven away fast fast!

Dimples said...

Lol...too mad only in Naija.
@Mona..men this is Jand o..they will first use baseball bat or shoot you..before they start discussions...so be warned.

Olawunmi said...

meahwhile, that remote sounds like a Nobel Prize winning idea.

anybody want to fund the research?

[ducks out of room to avoid lethal missiles aimed at head by a million beautiful angry women]

lol

nosa101 said...

Mehn!!!!!!!! You are mad o!!

Life through rose-tinted glasses said...

lol this was very funny but i feel ur anger i my self was getting a bit angry for a minute that serves them right it'll teach them that they cant just be driving anyway they like and the driver who did that must have thot bcos u are a woman u wouldnt be abke to do anything. good on u girl

Azuka said...

Biodun, you truly dey crase. I kno wwhere to run in the blogosphere now -- when I need advice, I'll hop over to Christabelle's, and when I want to laugh, here's the place :D.